Sometimes things don't go the way we expect...the way we hope. Yesterday was my fourth, first ultrasound. My other three, first ultrasounds (with Cade, Clementine, and Charleigh) went so well; I didn't expect this ultrasound to be any different. But it was.
I left without full confidence. I left without a picture.
We don't know anything for sure, yet. We appreciate your prayers as we wait for more information. I'll keep you posted.
In the meantime, I want to share, with praise: I'm in a good place. I mean that in terms of both physical and spiritual location. I don't mean to imply that I don't want to go to bed and sleep through the waiting...or that I haven't done some of that.
Sometimes, in times of trouble, we see clearly how very blessed we are.
I've spent the past 24 hours rounding up the troops. And I have them: troops. They're praying people. They include my immediate family members. When I called my mom, she was working with my brother, and--after she hung up the phone--they prayed for me, together. My brother sent a text message: "I can be there in 8hrs. i will come if u need me."
My son accompanied me to church, last night; he always does. Just now, I passed through the kitchen and noticed, on the refrigerator, the buildings and stars he sketched during prayer meeting. He wrote, at the top: "Have a good day, Mom."
My husband and I went to bed, last night, and he held me in his arms and prayed, aloud, into my hair.
And all my friends are standing by. Becky prayed with me over the phone. Rachel and Erin called the house, today, to check on me: Erin from a sunny vacation spot. I could go on and on about my people.
But above and beyond and behind all of it...them...is the great eye of the Lord, and it rests on me as surely as the orange-yellow moon hangs untethered in the night sky, above our log cabin.
For the past three weeks, I've prepared and taught Sunday school lessons on "joy." This past Sunday, we focused (in part) on the joy we should feel in knowing: Jesus was born into this terrible place of sin, and suffering, and death to save us. "Behold," the angel of the Lord says to the shepherds, "I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord" (Luke 2:10-11, KJV).
My class and I looked, too, at the experience of the wise men, who followed a moving star to Bethlehem. When it came to rest above Jesus's exact location, the wise men "rejoiced with exceeding great joy" (Matthew 2:10, KJV)...before they saw Jesus...before they met Him! They had been waiting, traveling! so long to meet the Object of their desire and affection, and they rejoiced in knowing the time was near.
And you know what? The Savior has always been available to me. I've known where to find Him since I was a child. Regardless of situation or season, I can rejoice: I know exactly where He is.